Love and other disasters

What is it about relationships that convert our brains into sawdust ? what is it about expressing your emotions that one chickens out ? what is it about insecurity that makes us cringe and suffer all by ourselves? what is it about betrayal that never teaches us a lesson and we tread on it again?

In the past 2 years of blogging, i have got so many friends who have along the way, shared their lives, their loves, their heart breaks with me. A lot of time i get questions on "how did you get to meet G?" or "how do you know he is the right guy?" "how come you dont get bored of eachother " " dont you guys fight at all " "i wish i would find my perfect man/woman soon "

And everytime i love saying the same thing "that perfect person is tucked away somewhere, perfectly unaware of your existence, but equally eager to meet you "

Your perfect girl is not necessarily going to have a flawless complexion and skill sets to quench your various appetites. She will just be a regular girl, whose one funny statement, or one silly gesture will make you get up and take notice. She probably would find your blogging stupid and sharing your life on the web, ridiculous, but then, she becomes the subject of so many of your posts.

He is probably the kinds who shies away from people, while you love standing on the bar and dancing. He probably will think you are one insane girl to do that, but perhaps the minute you topple over and laugh at yourself, he realises, she aint that mad...just a little more !

How difficult is it for you to tell him that you like him ? its not like his denial would crash your world. There are loads of fishes in the sea, you just need to find another one who agrees that swimming under the sun, drunk on Vodka is as much fun as you think.

So he stays miles away and just talking over the phone aint enough. You need to hold him close, you want to put your head on his shoulder for the next movie you watch, you want his fingers holding yours, everytime you get scared of crossing the road. Isnt it awesome you actually can picture doing all this with someone. When you put your head on the pillow and ear to the phone you can actually tell him, you wished he was with you doing the silliest of things.

the enxt time you fight, imagine , you would not even like to think of him being with you, just for those 2 nights though. I am sure the fight does not see a third night :)

Do you know G works in an office where i have seen women wear sports shoes with churidars and bindis with skirts(ankle length). its kind of relaxing to know the company he has is not threatening. But yes, when he is travelling abroad in countries where Geisha's are found on roads, porn industry is legal, and office attire ends at your knees, i do  dont have disturbed nights. The man knows he is one of the luckiest on this planet to have a wife who gets him Jack Daniels and Zippos for his birthdays, i am sure he doesnt want to loose that. And oh , i have no clue of his call register or inbox.(actually he has some 780 messages from me in his cell, he deletes the others)

Of course there has been trouble once in a while, when he picks up my cell to make a call to his mom and he sees a mysterious number :) in the 3 years of marriage the mysterious number last appeared last year :) Thats because no one is more precious to me than my man, no one!!

How often do you send an "i love you " message from your cell, just random, out of the blue. Maybe the sight of a cheesy lasagna ad, which you want to share with her , tempts you to do so. Maybe the red silk lingerie on display makes you feel like being around her, maybe a really nice Boss watch at the mall, makes you think of him...so whats stoping you from saying so? yeah i know sometimes the reply comes after 2 hours (ask me!) but so what, who said everything is supposed to be equal. He will never look as hot as you do after a work out and she will never beat you at Scrabble.

Lets not be those who stop others from dancing, lets not be one of those who think drinking in public is bad, lets not crib about the cigarette packet in her purse or in his car, lets not cry over the girl he had kissed in his garage at 16, lets not sulk about the boys who stalk her on FB. None of it makes one bad, none of it makes one gross or loud , none of it makes one uncouth. Its what she likes now and what he enjoys doing today. Tomorrow will be different and if you want to see the difference, stay by him, hold her hand and think about what i said " the perfect person is tucked away somewhere, maybe she is the one, perhaps he is the perfect guy, stop searching. Stop finding faults, give up complaining. Just think how lucky you are, that you have someone to fight or complain to. A lot of us dont "