Madness was me back then!!!

Its been long since i wrote something which is my usual self..but before i go there, let me thank you for your messages on my last post facebook and Gmail and my cell phone on recovering..with the good Lords blessings i weigh 3 Kgs more and after 23 anti-biotics and being the largest consumer of crocin in 5 days,i am back in office. Thank you guys..all of you for being such amazing friends..

As i was left out for a long while, i tried doing some catching up and landed up here at BlogAdda which somehow made me think, its been long since i recalled the good ol' wild days, where nothing was planned, being reckless and giddy headed was so much fun, being fearless was just a part of me..now of course i have managed to change, i think of calories and i get scared, i think of the hot girl in G's office and i get scared, i think of my mother looking thinner than me and i get scared..but hey, i have had my share of crazy moments..

When i was in college, i used to always love gossiping..i still do..and once we were just talking about random things you'ow , at 2am about ghosts,how girls have babies and how someone wrote a poem for the school Basketball coach. Amid all this three of us, somehow managed to jump the PG wall, get on the main road and i the Brave heart of all, covered myself with a white bedsheet and held a torch under the bedsheet, stood in the middle of the road waiting for the first victim. Life has its funny ways of playing pranks and soon when i saw the headlights of an approaching car i switched on the torch and started my slow swaying. In a matter of one hour, i was sitting on a bench with my two friends,and a friend talking to the policeman on duty..i had managed to "scare" the patrolling police jeep.

This was something that happened when i was around 20 so i was grounded severely, but what happened with me at the age of 5 was unforgivable. all i tried doing was put my hands inside the bar of the cage housing the monkeys at the zoo. As i tried aiming nuts at the baby monkey, i suddenly found myself looking into the eyes of the mother monkey, fixed to the ground since , my hand which was inside the cage was held tightly by the mommy monkey. And in those 3 seconds life changed as i became the first human to be slapped by a female monkey for having thrown nuts at her baby. My childhood bore marks of that slap for a long time.

I had always been very fond of eating, and as a kid my mum used to put sugar between parathas and toast it on the hot tawa. I was given my share of 2 parathas and some were kept for daddy. So one sunday when no one was watching i sneaked to the kitchen and took out daddy's share of the parathas and was in heaven. As i took the first bite i heard mom coming into the kitchen, and the smart child that i was ,i hid under the sink . By evening i was running high fever and crying out loud since in the process of hiding under the sink to hide my crime,i had placed my cute lil ass on the hot tawa..and the rest is as they say "history"

I could go on and on but i will leave you with two more masterpices of my childhood. I remember myself calling out Gods name and my mothers as i found my head stuck inside the pressure cooker. I tried not to waste the gravy of the chicken curry at the bottom of the pressure cooker, so in an effort to lick it all up, i got into a tight position..literally(Now you know why my brain's growth has been restricted)

And of course the last piece of madness i must tell you is when i was in college. I was always a chamiya..you know the cute ones, who speak with a twang and love clubbing(in my colleges we were called chamiya's) so one day Hottie that i was decided to wear a white shirt and denims with a red lipstick since i wanted to look classy that night..not the regular chindi tops. So while i stepped on the dance floor ,and started getting interesting looks from people around i realised that i am the original diva who can make a plain white shirt look sexy. Sexy indeed it was, since there were neon lights. and you know what happens when you wear white under neon lights...little is left to ones imagination..

There you go..another glimpse of me when i was not cooking palak paneer and sending "love you" mesages to my husband..i was just an ordinary girl , with simple experiences in life

And yes did i tell you what i stand to win if i prove my lunacy in this contest..check this website of Pringoo and i am sure you would love what i picket for myself

Happy Birthday QMT

Birthday' s are always to be celebrated with style and panache, a time to get wild, stay stylish, speak well, shout out load, let your hair down and wear that Nina Ricci, with bright red painted nails..yes blood red.

Time to be coy with the man and crazy with the friends, a dash of wit and lots of class, running high and dry on Martini, with the proverbial olives, wild classy timeless and high!!

Happy Birthday Queen!! Have a splendid one tomorrow !! cheers

PS: I really like king, so the Jack Daniles on the rocks is him

Happy Birthday G baby

For the man who made me look up at stars and see a new world

for the man who made me look up at the sky and smile

you taught me to keep dreaming and beleiving

you have been the best thing to wake up to every morning, as you lie wrapped in your blanket

you make me come home early , just so i can cook a fast evening snack by the time you reach home

and the look on your face on having that with the evening cup of tea, makes up for all my troubles

i love the way you crib about watering the plants and making the morning tea

i secretly love seeing you sulk if we forget to pick your "brittania crackers" during our weekly grocery shopping

buying your clothes has been one of my favorite things to do and when you say "i already have so many" i satisfy myself with a pack of kerchiefs

the way you rub my feet, when we sit on the couch after the evening cooking

and the way you try to roll the chappatis for me

the smile you have when i tell you "come i will sponsor tonights dinner"

and the smile you have when i say "oopss i forgot my wallet"

you surprise me with your patience, when we go shopping for you and i buy stuff in two big bags

your enthusiasm of making cheese omlettes in the microwave and vegetable fried rice, while you always forget to switch off the Microwave

the sudden decision to have green tea and the weird obsession for fried fish

the honest slurp on every piece of cake or brownie i bake for you

the way you notice a pair of earings or a new footwear, even if i have worn them so many times

and that when you make me feel brand new, in your little way , along the way

do you remember how i always told you "baby, you are too good to be true"...i still say so

and today as we add one more candle to your birthday cake, i wanna promise that i will always say " baby you will always be too good to be true"

Happy Birthday G baby

We've Only Just Begun..11/2/10

As G and I get excited(he pretends to be calm though i know how happy he is too) about our second marriage anniversary plans, it would be incomplete for me if i dint share a part of my joy with you guys. Everyone waits for that special someone to walk into their lives. That one person who would be her world,her life and everything she had ever wanted or dreamt of. That one person whom you will ask "where were you all this while" but believe me, they are wrapped and carefully kept aside for your somewhere and one day as you breathe,he/she will come before you and knock your breathe away.No wonder i say the moment you fall in love all your saved-up wishes start coming out..So just a glimpse of our marriage,and i say its only just begun..

G this one's for you baby,

For bringing meaning to the words "i love you"

Being a part of my existence and being known as your wife

The man i know i can annoy all my life

The comfort of knowing you are there...just there for me

the everyday afternoon 10 second call asking if i had my lunch

the habit of texting you to let you know i am on my way back home

Getting that quick reply"will leave shortly baby"

saving all your texts in my inbox, even though i do not read them that often

every mail sent by you,be it about ticket reservations or a fight,saved in my inbox

insisting i enjoy cooking for you, even as you worry about me getting tired

praying secretly to God to bless us with some babydust as we grow two years into our marriage

Thanking God for giving me much more than i had ever asked for

The everyday ritual of waking you up with the morning tea and your favourite crackers as you crib about how your eyes hurt,or stomach hurts or its simply too cold

Realising that i dont need to always talk to make my presence felt

Realising how soon your parents became ours and you started calling mine twice a week without me reminding you to do so

Sharing your dreams and making you believe that there is nothing more important than living your dreams

As i live mine i want you to dream more, wish for the sky and i will be right next to you

We have been angry with Him when he was unfair with us, and the next minute i thanked him for keeping you by my side,as we hugged each other and cried

For keeping your hands on mine as a tear rolled down my cheek watching a movie(and then not making it public)

For your IMMENSE patience, which is challenged every time we go out shopping

The tight hug after we fought

For reminding me of you and your ways on every new song i listen to and making me smile even when you are not around

For telling everyone "i always hold Sulagna's hand, if i dont she shops"

For your default smile and head tilt when i take out the camera for a picture

For letting me be myself and making me a better person with your love and patience..

Two years now and everyday just gets more treasured as we celebrate our marriage and all i can say is baby "we've only just begun"

I love you G

Exotic bachelor parties and hickies..all in the ladies loo

I have been away form my blog for a long while, and what has prompted me faster to return is not just that my event went off well(for which i was in mumbai for 20hours) but also all you guys who have sent me mails and written on my face book wall..thank you so much..everyone...

i have been kind of at a loss of ideas on what to write since

1.i was too caught up with work,therefore not having time to visit your blogs

2. a little troubled had creeped into my paradise,but the damage has been controlled

3. i dint get much time at home so i could not do my marital musings

4.telecom and braodband were of more importance in my life for a week than my usual wassup and howdies

Our event was at one of Mumbai's most posh 5 star properties,near the airport. so since we were the organizers,i had to be at the hotel when the marbles were being wiped and fresh flowers were being placed in vases. i was in a saree which meant making sure my drapes are in place every one hour,since i dont wear a saaree frequently but would love to.

Scene 1

I stood in front of the mirror trying to decide if i should pleate the edge of my saree or let it fall over my shoulder. I saw two very well dressed women..well dressed here refers specially to beautifully manicured feet and a gucci bag(this si enough to make some one well dressed)

lady 1: did you hear about jennifer? she is in London again

lady2: what?? why??/ i thought things were fine with her husband now..

lady1: things are not fine dear,she iss till not wearing the wedding rign he had given her,she has some other ring on that finger..i noticed

lady 2:ohhh i pity Rohit..he has to go through so much for ehr

lady1 : it is completely jennifers fault,why does she always ahve to tag with him..Rohit had gone for sandy's bachelor party and apprently,jennifer went at 3 on the pretext of picking him up since he would be drunk..poor rohit,everyone was laughing behind his back

lady2: ohh these bachelor parties..i dont know why do they ahve to make it so exotice..

lady 1: abhisheks was awesome,i heard he had some Mongolian contortonist artists there

lady 2: ohh my gawdd..they cpme with feathers and all attached to their dress

By now i had forgotten what was i doing and listening too intently to their conversation. However when they both went inside the loo i smiled and walked off

Scene 2:

two young girls, probably college student walk inside the loo when i was trying to pin my saree.

Girl 1: shit maaan!! its so warm inside but i have to wear this damn scarf

girl2: nikal le na(take it off)

girl1:nooo i cant ...i got a hicki (giggles)

girl2: nooo way...show meeee

girl1: last night when he dropped me back home ,tab hua (giggles again)

girl2: dint your mom see?

girl1:noo ya i was wearing a salwaar kameez today at home and then when i was stepping out i wore the scarf

girl2:aree i heard if you ruba crocin there for sometime the mark goes

girl1: nooo but i want it ya...tomorrow in college i am not wearing any scarf for sure..anyways everyone knows Vicki and i are seeing eachother

Girl2: acah a gimme the new lip shade you brought last week..need to try

as they started egttign busyw ith their make -up i moved out

there are two more scenes i need to tell you..but later..i hate long posts..

It easy to say I love you because...

i set the alarm at 6:30 and you pull me in till 7

i run helter skelter to get ready for office,while you look at me and say"baby is looking beautiful"

i lock the house but always need to check if you have the spare set of keys

while you start messaging me while in office"come home soon baby,i will leave in a while"

i reach office and start off with work when my cell rings and a message flashes"have a nice day baby" and my replies are "drive safely and eat on time baby"

i fret over what to pack for your lunch while you savour the filthy vada pao in the evening

you keep telling me "baby i am trying to gain weight"

but i see you sticking to two slices of pizza while i am on the garlic bread,after 3 slices of the pizza

you wear a blue shirt with jeans but change it immediately to a white one the moment i say"why did you wear this shirt ya?"

as i adjust my short kurti you walk past saying"oh you wearing your old clothes"

and needless to say i change into something which does not fall in your category of "old clothes"

i leave from office and immidiately text you"come home baby,i am home"

and you know m not,but reply saying"on my way baby"

a bed full of pillows and blankets but you are the warmest i get to hug

a weekend of eating out and you say"i dont want to eat out ,please cook something for me"

a room full of books and a chest full of CD's,but you wait for me to talk when we are home

and i do talk ,knowing i would just have a good audience which listens a lot and speaks just a little

i get you cards and write you notes on the wall and bathroom mirror

and you give me that funny smile with a look that says"sorry i dont this for you but i love it when you do this for me"

i complain that "your hair oil is stinking and so are you"

but there is nothing as amazing as snuggling in your neck

you make it a point to look at me everyday for 4 seconds as we go down the lift together,it makes my day perfect

when my stomach hurts and my head aches,i thank God it is not a heart ache

and i demand an immediate cure, you

I pretend to be afraid of crossing the roads,and wait for your hand to slip into mine

you snore a little when you sleep and never did i know i would find someone snoring cute

i try to sleep but keep my eyes open for another few seconds to see you doze off at night...

I thank god for not having to worry anymore about the suitcase weight and boarding pass

even though i get chills when i remind you if you took the tickets,and i see you shooting upstairs to pull out the tickets from my cupboard

i look at some hot chic with in a resturaunt while you say"what kind of clothes is she wearing"

i pretend to laugh at your old ideas but glad that you dont oogle at women

your idea of a perfect holiday is beer prawns sea beach and beer and prawns

while i first check "places to shop"

and the best part is i suggest which prawns you should have and you help me decide between the black and the pink purse.

you are like the prayer that i had sent to God so long back and it got answered suddenly,making "us" the most beautiful serendipity could ever be

Thank you for being what you are to me..

i laugh,i live and i love you

Anniversary and Awards

h how i missed witting and reading on the blog..been a week almost that i have not written anything and some amazing people have even e-mailed me and asked me my whereabouts..and believe me its a wonderful feeling to know that there are people out there to read your ramblings!! thanks Thousif :)

And now for so mant things that have been happening!!

1.i want to thank everyone for reading my blogs,adding to my treasure of comments and helping me smile wider.

2.Rohit and Sunakshi thanku big big time for the "awesome blogger award" i shall be posting everything here..right now

3.my anniversarry was extr

a special.i guess thats because i had soooo many of you wishing me..and even if they are late they are working magic cuz G would be travelling to Shanghai for a project which he wanted to ne in desperately..thank you on his behalf too.

4.i am putting up a picture o

f my anniversary.all complete with the saree and tattoo..

5.Life has been kind of racing past me becaus eof work in office,

which is again super nice

6.we are in the process of moving to a new house so chanig minds over curtains costing more than 7K for one room :(

7. also busy shopping for

the upcoming Goa trip..all suggestions welcome fro "places must visit" since you guys should advise people like me,visiting goa for the first time.

8. I have been trying to get into the dieting phase but all those cupcake recipes on Tv dont help

9.Pune is facing "november rains" and i am absolutely loving this weather because my garden is blooming,i love cuddling into the bed early and i ahve a genuine excuse for being late at work"traffic bohut tha"(

there was a lot of of traff

ic)

10.i have noticed a few steaks of grey hair on my head :( but nothign has stopped em from wearing torn jeans and bright pink Crocs.

and now rohit and sunaksh

i,since you guys have again made me bloat with happiness about the award, i am absolutely smiling to know i have two such wonderful friends here..rohit who is still apprehensive about the tattoo,after my scary description

Sunakshi,because of the way she

laces her poetry with feelings,which somehow remind ome of my life before it was all roses and honey

here is thanking you so much for it and passing it on tooo

http://mrs-adventure.blogspot.com/

http://knowthousif.blogspot.com/

http://mytumblingthoughts.blogspot.com/

http://whysoserioustoday.blogspot.com/

http://mohitluthur.b

logspot.com/

http://mansichitranshi.blogspot.com/

http://fiercelyweird.blogspot.com/

http://faicarter.blogspot.com/

Now the next ap

rt of the award says that i need to write 7 thing

s that my readers dont know about me..so i thought lets make it a mixed bag which make you say "awwww" and "eeoo

www"

1. I love dipping y biscuits in warm tea and bite into them when they are

moist and soggy.

2.I try to keep one day a

week for eating only vegetarian food,but more

often that not i am tempted to sin.

3.i have spent 3/4th of my life taking a shower since i love taking showers and baths so much

4.i sometimes forget to brush my teeth...in the morning. (and then pop 3 chewing gums )

5.i talk in my sleep and love talking to myself in the mirror..even though i am perfectly sane

6.i am a narcissist

7.I am addicted to Facebook,Orkut and Blogspot ..

and now(drumrolll) my award :) :) yipee yipee

pictures of our amazing anniversary celebration :) *blush blush*

award shaward!!!

yes yes i have one more award given and even though this is just the second one i can say thank you to chocolate girl

http://chocolatychocolatelover.blogspot.com/

"thank you to my parents who taught me to read and write

thank you dear chacha ji for giving me a fountain pen when i was 7 years old

thank you singh uncle for giving me the purple pencil box,i took pencils in it with which i scribbled on school walls

thank you Inder rickshaw walla for taking me to school everyday

thank you shaanti mausi for keeping the school "toilets" clean and contributing to my education

thank you prem bahadur ji for keeping our school safe

thank you everybody ..thank you thank you

*clap clap*

in the last row *sob sob*

all over the hall..drumroll!!!!

Oh !! Calcutta

There is something about food that intrigues me much more than it would an ordinary man or woman for that matter. The sights,smells and flavours of Bengali cuisine especially is something i have laced in my being to from the time i was a child. My first memory of cooking was when ma used to heat some mustard oil and put some pods of Garlic to do some "maalsih" when i was 3. This is an ancient Bengali way of massaging a baby in the winter months since mustard oil and garlic would keep the baby's body warm..and surprisingly i dint smell of garlic at all,cus post bath i had another herbal oil rubbed all over me.

I guess that smell of the burning garlic caught on to me and i have ever since paid interest to cooking ,which ma did. In the cold winter mornings, as Ma would boil the drinking water,she used to keep my school uniform on the lid of the huge pan so it was warm when i wore it after my bath. I had always had this liking for kitchens and i had my little private corner,on top of an old iron trunk. during winters the trunk would be warm because of the cooking and the heat in the kitchen I used to watch ma toss warm rotis in my plate as the "torkari" (vegetables) cooked on the other burner.

Fortunately for me G shares my excitement when it comes to cooking and eating at home or our weekend eat outs. Sunday mornings memories of the last one and a half years is of me sitting in the bed,while G comes with a tray full of Masaal Maggi cheese omlette and garam "chaa". And let me add ,his Maggi is always filled with vegetable making our breakfast super yummy and colourful.Just the colour of the green peas with the orange carrots against the yellow Maggi,and right next to it giving it company is the super fluffy omlette with cheese grated inside!!bliss.

When i started with "Pink n Black" i had planned to write everything and anything i could think of, obviously looking forward to people reading and enjoying and leaving comments too:). So as i write this on Monday morning i am overwhelmed with this responsibility of spreading good words about a restaurant we went to Saturday Night.

A restaurant which knows it food well and how to please its patrons is Oh! Calcutta. As much as i am in love with the name i can swear by the food they offer.I mean where else will you get cocktaisl named "Kaal Boishaki" which is the name we use for the april showers. Right from its entree`s of Golda Chingri(prawnas) and pompfret cutlet to the main course,of ilish maach and rui aloor daalna :) the most amazing desserts are to follow pleasing your pallet and ensuring you are imprisoned to Bengali cuisine for a lifetime.

I hope this helps in tempting you some more

http://www.speciality.co.in/calcutta.php

Ashutosh Chalisa

The first time it hit me..i was left with a black eye and a thumping heart with a blood pressur of 160/260(approximately)

the next time i saw it halt before my feet,i knew all i wanted to do was touch it once

On the third time as it swung through the wind i wanted to hold it and run away...

It was the Basketball Ashutosh played with

and now when you are done laughing at my expense ,you ask who is Ashutosh??

I was in Std 8,super comfortable in my skirts with the unwaxed legs, white socks rolled down and mud-stained sneakers , a pony tail too high and tight that i managed to stretch my fore head by 2 CM's. I was the epitome of a comfortable 14 year old,busy with her Archies,evening show of FRIENDS,learning Chemistry equations and discussing about sex.

yes i was a regular 14 year old ...till Ashutosh Mishra's basket ball hit my head.

I own the damage to my head not to the basketball but to the player.Ashutosh Mishra, the guy who always leaped the highest,had the loudest high five and the tallest attitude in the basketball court. The first time i saw him,in his loyola yellow "ganji" and navy blue shorts,i knew what Greek Gods wore,this is what Gods are amde of,yellow ganji and navy blue lycra shorts. Slam Dunk only meant love to me,another beautiful way of putting it perhaps.The basketball team captain and he had his own bike..no no not the Scooty types but a bike.Sometimes i also saw him driving his father Fiat..ohh did a Fiat ever look as nice,with him in his blue t-shirt. I knew he had 3 different t-shirts in shades of Blue. His backpack was black and so were his sunglasses(one of the few boys who wore them) He had a favorite chair at the canteen where he and his friends would sit everyday and high-five over Pepsi and Samosas.I tried so many times to speak to him but my tongue dint move ..till one day

I was in my school fair and i had a stall called Hoopla..where you place 10 cans in a pyramid and you are supposed to knock all of them off in 3 shots. As my friends and i were busy arranging the cans,i heard his voice"Hi we would like to play this too" and that was it..i froze..no literally i did cuz i knew i was blushing so badly that he could have seen me as a red alert.My friends with their giggles and nudging dint help either..As i stood watching him hit the pyramid,i knew...this is the man i will marry..i mean who else could hoop the cans in 3 shots?? i was sure this is the man who would kiss me and my legs would tremble.This was the man whose arms were to leave the basketball and hold me,this was the man whose mother would celebarte Karva Chauth with me..Oh what bliss could i ask for???

My love grew far and wide and so did its fame..till a time came where i stood by the dosawala to have the Masala Dosa and his friends shouted "Mishraaa" ohhh i still remember the chatni dripping off my leaf plate as my friends laughed at the attention they got..Within a minute i could see Mishra walk ahead and i was sure he was smiling cuz he could have heard my heart beating even at that distant. What followed was a tasteless Dosa,a shivering hand to pay the money,and an equally shaky me riding my scooty back home.

Its been 13 years now and i write this today after seeing an album titled"our little bundle of joy" and a baby girls photo in the FB profiel of Dr.Ashotosh Mishra

old cards,chocolate wrappers and earings

i cant help it, but i have a natural talent to collect crap, at least thats how some may perceive it . But for me they are a part of me...just a few things i can remember at 11 in the night,when i am in one of my compulsive blogging phases,gripped by ideas(oh intelligent me)

1. a card given my "secret admirer" back in school,lies in the lowest shelf in my cupboard back home. G would probably not appreciate it that much.

2.a photograph of ma n baba in my wallet which is officially the longest duration for an object to be with me and i mean it!!! its been 8 years i have that pic.

3.a pair of red shorts, 10 inches long only,worn during sports day practise in school(i was 10 years old)

4.a wooden momento of my schools 50 year celebration. Though i wanted to be a ballet dancer, i became a beer drinking carpenter dancing on some country music in the hallowed XLRI auditorium.

5.a picture of me in a "banana race" in lowerKG during sports day

6.the shirt i wore on my 10th std farewell,with graffiti over it,wishing me best of luck with "secret admirer"

7.a scrap book signed by all my friends during the time Titanic was a hit since everyones fav song in the scrap book is "my heart will go on"

8. a secret diary with some even more secret content in the pages, all tied up with a lavender bow and covered in pink wrapping paper.

9.a wind chime gifted by secret admirer that still chimes in my bedroom window

10.an old pair of shades,which somehow finds it way back into my cupboard inspite of all the moving i have done.

11.some heartbreaking memories of people whose birthdays (and marriage anniversaries) i always remember.

12.earings i wore for my "socials",the planning of which is done 3 months in advance.So the earing were very important too.

13. a toll pass from Vashi to Bandra(i will not divulge any more details)

14. the first mail G sent me, begining with "Hi Sulagna"

15. an unfinished cup of tea,not sweet enough, reminding me of life and in the end finding the sugar cubes undisolved at the bottom

16. a bottle of Guess lotion which is taking its last breath but i will never let go of it.

17.some immortal jokes which i had learnt while staying up with my cousins 6 years back..they still work,considering they are based only on abuses:)

18.the gift wrapping in which i got my first gift as someones fiance` G stuck to a yellow ribbon only,for the St.Oliver he got me.

19. a yellow post it ,put in my lunch box on 14th feb '09 saying" enjoy your lunch baby and happy valentines day.....G"

20.friends who have stood by me and are my best kept memories :) Shiv,Elli,Sam,Nin

Are men "Up" to it??

So you are getting married in a few months and have been running all across the town to get your bridal trousseau in place, the guest list, the flowers to be pink and not peach, and amidst all this speak to him to decide the dates for the honeymoon. Marriage is a tough job and you have to be up to it…quite literally.

What are we up about: What started off a few days ago by Tamil veteran actor Manorama has rifted ideas and ideologies of people. What may sound like an irrelevant advice from an aunt is what the Tamil Nadu chief minister has been asked to forward as a law. Manorama says that sexual potency test should be made mandatory before you take your sacred vows and considers this as a necessary social and health issue. It is important to have your man’s potency checked before marriage since one needs to be completely aware of what she is “in” for.

The warning bells: Noted Psychiatrist Dr. Ajay Pal Singh and several other marriage counselors say this is nothing more than erecting a mountain of a mole hill. Several noted social workers like Ms. Poornima Advani, with the National Commission For Women say that this kind of a test is not practically possible since there can be no mathematical formula to bring compatibility between a couple or check potency to n accurate level. In Kanpur there are a group of rural women who have approached a mahila helpline run by an NGO on legal help for divorce for not getting sexual satisfaction from their husbands. In case a man is found impotent, the marriage will be called as null and void. This does not call for a divorce since sex is an important part of marriage. Male potency is one of India’s oldest and best kept secrets since we are predominantly a patriarchal society. Poornima suggests that perhaps the government should set aside counselors to speak to young couple or young girls especially, to tell them about the sexual aspects that marriage involves. Passing any legislation to this affect can be highly and grossly misused and thus counselors should come in the picture for help. Also as Dr.Prakash Kothari, noted Sexologist says you can sometimes measure potency by a machine called NPTR(Nocturnal Penile tumescence and rigidity testing) machine , however it will just be one component out of several other aspects of male potency.

The sunny side up: We spoke to some women and tried to find out what their translation of this subject is. Ninfa Oommen a working professional welcomes this new concept saying if the purpose of the test is to check if the groom is sexually healthy ,then, it is as necessary as checking if your partner has any medical abnormalities which can affect your children in the future. However, she points out that this test should not judge if a man can impregnate his wife since this is covenant to other factors like love and intimacy. Men however have given mixed responses, some saying that this is just another one of those “publicity stunts” by people while others have welcomed this owning to the fact that this should settle scores right in the beginning. More and more people are opening up to the thought that men should be open to get certified of being able to provide conjugal response.

Potency should definitely be a topic of interpersonal talks between a couple before marriage. With sexual gratification for women no longer being a tabooed subject and with sexuality becoming an unabashed aspect of marriage, the obligatory walk in the park will soon be up to discussions of the birds and the bees.